essay

A new decade

I have a significant birthday coming up–only significant because we have ten fingers on our hands and therefore we have a base-ten system and we get fascinated with decades. If we were using a base-twelve system, there would be nothing significant about my birthday at all.

But here we are. I’m entering a new decade and therefore I’m reflective. I’m not going to be young anymore.

In the last decade, I have graduated from college, gotten married, had two-full time jobs, and had four children and became a stay-at-home mom. We’ve lived in three different states and moved a lot. I’ve supported my husband in his school and career. I’ve also self-published two novels, maintained multiple blogs, taken a lot of photographs, worked on my family history, and decorated multiple houses. And I’ve read at least 52 books every year. I’ve made a lot of friends. I’ve been part of different communities. I’ve taught my children as well as I can.

I am in a good place right now, and I’m heading in a good direction. Sometimes I wonder if I’ve done enough, particularly because life has not turned out how I expected it to. I have failed in some things. I have never been a successful writer, and now I don’t plan on pursuing writing anymore. I have dealt with some mental health issues and I’ve made a lot of mistakes along the way. Some times I don’t feel like I’ve done enough.

But being a mom was always been my dream, and I am so incredibly grateful for my family. They are enough. If I hadn’t accomplished anything on my own, I could be happy knowing that I am doing my best to raise my four children and have a happy home and a happy family.

And next to my family, I am most grateful for the friends that I have made. I miss friends I have moved away from a whole lot, but I am grateful for the opportunity to make friends in new places. Friendship is one of the biggest accomplishments there is in life–and it can be hard sometimes, but it’s worth it.